Friday, July 01, 2016

Two Kinds of "Star Trek" Fans...

I'm battling insomnia and a kidney stone; fortunately, I have tons of photo apps to keep my mind off of the pain. I thought I'd share this meme I just made here. And FTR: I'm a Salt Vampire fan myself! 

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Monday, June 27, 2016

Dear Sheila E...

See the tribute here:


Sunday, April 24, 2016

The 25 Best Songs to Mourn Prince

On April 21st, 2016, the musical universe lost one of its brightest stars: Prince Rogers Nelson, known all over the world simply as Prince. 

One of the reasons I adore* Prince's music, is that it is so diverse and covers such a wide range of topics. In his long career, he crafted songs about nuclear holocaust, music critics, sex tapes, religious awakenings, and more. No matter what your mood, your situation, your wants or your needs...there's likely a Prince song or two to help you celebrate, purge, guide, uplift, and grieve. 

And so, as we adjust to a world without the unique brilliance of Prince Rogers Nelson, naturally, we turn to his music to celebrate his life and mourn his loss. 

Whether you are a lifelong fan like yours truly...or are only now, after his death, learning why Prince is so cherished by so many, here's a list of the 25 Prince songs best suited for mourning this true musical genius who left us far too soon. And just as his music was diverse, so is this list: these songs run the gamut between heartfelt ballads to club hits and almost everything in between. 

25) Welcome 2 the Dawn ("The Truth," 1998) 

24) Starfish & Coffee ("Sign o' the Times," 1987) 

23) Love ("3121," 2006) 

22) My Love is Forever ("For You," 1978)

21) The Love We Make  ("Emancipation," 1996) 

20) Into the Light ("Chaos and Disorder," 1996) 

19) The Arms of Orion ("Batman," 1989) 

18) The Ladder ("Around the World In a Day," 1985) 

17) Wherever U Go, Whatever U Do ("Rave Un2 the Joy Fantastic," 1999) 

16) Cream ("Diamonds and Pearls," 1991) 

15) It's Gonna Be a Beautiful Night ("Sign o' the Times," 1987) 

14) The Cross ("Sign o' the Times," 1987)

13) Anna Stesia ("Lovesexy," 1988) 

12) Future Soul Song ("20Ten," 2010) 

11) Let's Go Crazy ("Purple Rain," 1984) 

10) Money Don't Matter 2 Night ("Diamonds and Pearls," 1991)

9) Call My Name ("Musicology," 2004)

8) Everywhere ("The Rainbow Children," 2001) 

7) Beautiful, Loved & Blessed ("3121," 2006) 

6) Free ("1999," 1982) 

5) Still Would Stand All Time ("Graffiti Bridge," 1990) 

4) Gold ("The Gold Experience," 1995) 

3) Purple Rain ("Purple Rain," 1984) 

2) I Wish U Heaven ("Lovesexy," 1988) 

There is a particular sad irony in the #1 spot: this song is all about the death of a friend and the profound emotions that accompany such a terrible loss. I have used this song for years & years to help me get through the deaths of those near & dear to me...and never in a million years did I think that Prince's death would occur in the same month as the subject of this song. Like the true showman he was, he got his curtain call at exactly the right time. Although this song isn't one of his most popular or well-known tunes, it was the clear choice for #1: 

1) Sometimes it Snows in April ("Parade," 1986) 


*no pun intended 


Thursday, April 21, 2016

Irony, via Timehop

I'm In a moment of true, sad irony...this is what my Timehop app told me today:

Rest in peace, Prince. I hope u saw the dawn...

Rest in Peace, Sweet Prince

Today, my all-time favorite musician, Prince, has died. I am heartbroken.

His music got me through so many tough times, and helped me celebrate so many great ones. 

He was my first concert, and part of my first tattoo (sadly covered up some years ago, as the work was appallingly bad; it's now under a sprig of morning glories). He will be part of the next one, as well. That much I know. 

Prince taught me that you can be comfortable with your sexuality, and still be a humble servant of the Lord. My favorite songs by him are "Anna Stasia" and "Erotic City," tunes that showcase those two parts of his personality well: the sexy lover, and the true believer. 

In a sad irony, his song "Sometimes It Snows in April" is the song I always play when I have lost a loved one.

Sometimes it snows in April...and today, it has.

Sunday, February 14, 2016

And So It Goes: More Extremism in Politics.

The Yesterday, Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia passed away. He was 79 years old.

Now comes the process of hiring a successor. And that is no cake walk, but when you think about it, it's not such a bad thing. I think it should be difficult. It is one of the most powerful positions in our government, and the appointment is for life (although you can retire, as Sandra Day O'Connor did several years ago). Getting this job should require a lot of work, and it should be done with two branches of government working together to find which jurist is best suited for a job in the third. 

It would be great if this process was done without partisan nonsense, but with the goal of making sure our judicial branch of the government is whole, and capable. But it rarely works that way. Instead, it's usually an all-out war between the GOP and the Democrats to keep the Supreme Court as far in their own pockets as they can get. 

Today on Twitter, I found this:

It's this sort of nonsense that irritates me in our two-party system. The extremists on both sides are so very loud and insistent, reason and rational cannot be heard in the same room with them.

In this particular meme, I am irked by both sides:

•The Republican, for making such a petty stand and proudly wanting to hold our judicial system in a state of limbo just because he doesn't like the President. He is choosing to deny any and all candidates based not on any individual jurist's work or accomplishments, but because the other party made the referral. And then there's...

•...the Democrat, who made the meme (presumably), for jumping the gun a little here. Sure, McConnell made the threat? but he hasn't actually DONE anything yet. Calling for his impeachment based only on a political soundbite is a bit much, and let's face it: most political promises go nowhere. And we rarely if ever call them out on it. To quote Rip Torn's character Artie on "The Larry Sanders Show": "Don't pull on that thread, the whole world will fall apart." 

I have even seen people online bashing
Bernie Sanders for releasing a statement of condolence to the family and friends Scalia left behind. Apparently, if a politician isnt lock-step with your own ideaology, it's unthinkable to show a little common decency to that politician's loved ones as they mourn. 

If that makes sense to you, you have gone too far into the extremes. 

Here's hoping the next Supreme Court Justice is deserving of the position. And that he or she will get the job based on their merits, and not be ruled out just because certain senators enjoy grinding the government to a standstill if it has any chance to irritate or thwart the person who recommended them for the job. 

Monday, February 01, 2016

Raising Awareness: The 29-Day Playlist!

Last year, I decided to raise awareness for a rather rare condition I have that affects people with significant hearing loss: musical hallucinatons.

I used my Twitter account (@ZenAngelSinger) to share, in real time, exactly what I was hearing, and in some cases, why. I called it The 28-Day Playlist (#28DayPlaylist).

I decided to do it again this year, with one small change...

There are 29 days in February this year! That is generally known as...

While researching Leap Year for this post, I found out that in days of yore, it was also called...

...bissextile year. Cue the Beavis and Butt-Head laugh: 

So this, my second year of the Playlist Project, has one extra day of music, commercial jingles, show tunes, theme songs and bad hair bands to share with all of you. 

This year, it's the 29-Day Playlist (#29DayPlaylist). 

I apologize that I am late to start today (I am having some unfortunate health issues right now. Sometimes, you need to share...and sometimes you need your get your mind off of it all. I am in the latter camp today.). 

So in the spirit of getting this show on the road, I am simply copying and pasting last year's intro to the Project and what musical hallucinatons really are...with two big changes: 1) I will address the vaccination debate this Project inexplicably sparked last year, and 2)...

I'll also edit for length or just from shits and giggles. It's my blog, after all.

So without further ado:

Rave Til Dawn: What It's Like to Have Musical Hallucinations

My health idiosyncrasies didn't begin with my first definitive MS symptom, at 21. Instead, it happened when I unexpectedly came down with the mumps. 

I had the large, painful lumps on the right side of my face/jaw, and I was miserable.

The mumps apparently enjoyed its sojourn in Casa Angel, so it left me with something to remember it by: I was now functionally deaf in my right ear. And that deafness itself gifted me with something even more rare than going deaf in one ear from the mumps: musical hallucinations

Despite its unfortunate name, musical hallucinations are not a mental illness. It's instead a type of tinnitus. It's almost always present in a person with some degree of hearing loss. Women are somewhat more likely to experience it than men.

So, what are musical hallucinations? In short: it's hearing music in your head, when no music is being played.

Everyone, from time to time, is plagued by the song they just can't get dislodged from their brain. 

In my case, every song is a song that gets "stuck" in my head. Musical hallucinations are basically just non-stop clips of music, not unlike an 70's-era K-Tel infomercial.

For me, the music is omnipresent, and the worst part? MH has no taste. It sees all music as equal...and it has no problem bombarding me with songs I love AND songs I hate. An all-time favorite tune (.       ) could be supplanted in the blink of an eye by a cereal jingle from the 80's (Smurfberry Crunch is fun to eat! A very berry breakfast treat!), Songs that are nothing less than an assault to the ears can be followed by a Mozart concerto. Bad, good or boring as makes no difference. 

There is never a time when I do not hear music. The only exception is when I am actually hearing music along with everybody else, via recordings or live performances, such as...

...this Rasputina concert Jonathan and I attended. It was a wonderful show which thankfully introduced me to one of my extra-strength Tune Stoppers: "1816 The Year Without a Summer" (more on that later).

Even when I am asleep, the music prevails.

If that sounds somewhat familiar, well, you're not alone. When I talk about the endless concert in my head, people will often remark, "Oh! Like the music box on "Star Trek," right?" 

Well, not exactly.

The concept of musical hallucinations made an appearance on the popular television program, "Star Trek: The Next Generation." Specifically the season three episode, "The Survivors."

In that episode, a human couple are the only survivors of an alien invasion that obliterated everything and everyone else on their planet...except their house, their lawn, and themselves.

Right away, Counselor Troi finds them suspicious, but as usual can't quite work out why.

Her efforts are thwarted when she begins to hear persistent music in her head. It's the same song, over and over again. The song itself was totally foreign to her; she'd never heard it prior to this mission. 

Unbeknownst to Troi, it's the tune that plays from the female survivor's antique music box. 

She confides in Picard, who consoles her by pointing out that everyone has had the experience of being assaulted by a song with a thousand encores. Deanna responds, "No. It's real." 

Dr. Crusher decides to put her in a medical coma, and an increasingly panicked Troi insists that it won't work. "The music will only follow me!" she cries. Later, when in the coma, Crusher notes that Troi "continues to act as if she hears the music." 

Eventually, (spoil alert) Picard discovers that there is really only one immortal being called a Dowd. He is responsible not only for the genocide of the alien attackers' entire species, but also for the music torturing the comatose counselor, for the crime of being close to finding out who and what he really was (he obviously didn't know Troi very well). 

That episode, and the musical/film "Amadeus," are the main examples of musical hallucinations seen in popular culture (please see the Update below). Mozart is tormented by music that he cannot stop and worse...he's the composer. He writes it down more to purge it from his system rather than to do his job. 

In both instances, it's portrayed as a bad thing: both Troi and Mozart nearly go crazy. 

In reality, the condition isn't related to any other mental illness and the sufferers almost never have any psychiatric conditions. 

Ironically, Mozart's music (particularly "Don Giovanni") is frequently a guest performer in the 24-hour concert venue in my head.

For better or for worse, I tend to remember songs I have been subjected to, even just once. This was very unfortunate when attending what I now affectionately refer to as "Cowboy High" in the early 90's.

However, it was a boon when I played in orchestras and sang in choirs. It certainly made memorizing the music a great deal easier!

It isn't so pleasant when I passionately hate a song and at any moment, I'll hear it over and over again, note-for-note, with no end in sight (damn you, "Life is a Highway"! You have tormented me far too many times, you awful bastard). 

There are a few songs that work well to dislodge melodies I cannot stand. I call them Tune Stoppers. Currently, I'm using one of the more effective Tune Stoppers ("Your Love" by the Outfield), in an attempt to drown out the song I unfortunately began hearing instantly after writing about it.

          You bastard.

Even when dreaming, the music is there. I often describe it as being a bit like Mozart as depicted in the movie "Amadeus," only with less genius songwriting...

...and more endless hours of Nickleback.

And there really isn't a damn thing you can do about it, except add to your Tune Stoppers list and avoid music you know you're likely to despise...and remember. 

There is no medication. Music therapy can help some sufferers; I understand that they also often suggest various versions of my Tune Stoppers method as a way to at least not be at the mercy of some terrible song that will ride you all night long...damn it! Not again! 

Many people with musical hallucinations hate it. Most of the time, I don't. Sure, it can be annoying sometimes, but in the end, it's just a part of who I am and I choose to see it positively. After all, I do love music.

In an effort to show people what it's like to have musical hallucinations, I will be using Twitter to document just what it is I am hearing for the month of February in a little experiment I call The 29-Day Playlist.

It will hopefully give some insight into what living with a constant dance hall in your head is like. So please follow my musical adventure at: @ZenAngelSinger!

UPDATE! A reader pointed out to me that there is another example of a television show using the "I can't get this song out of my head!" to comedic affect: the "Seinfeld" episode, "The Jacket." In this episode, George is unable to get the song "Master of the House" from "Les Miserables" out of his head. His constant humming/singing of the tune proves contagious to those around him, including Elaine's gruff & grumpy father! 

Wa do & thank you to Eddie Speghetti for the "Seinfeld" tip! You are truly a fountain of TV information. 

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

More Information:

This great article explains musical hallucinations perfectly:

I started this blog a decade ago, with the goal of sharing with others what it's like to live with multiple sclerosis chronic pain caused by MS- rel