Tuesday, December 21, 2004

The ZPT 100 Best Websites of the Year 2004!

I love the Internet. It's such a repository of fun and crap. This list is more of the first and hopefully less of the second.

These are all sites which I visited and loved in 2004. They are listed here in alphabetical order. Among them: funny animations, silly pictures, bizarre sites, liberal political humor, tattoo sites, Mommy sites, games, name generators, entertainment sites....you name it. What you WON'T see on here are blogs, homeschooling or shopping websites...I'm toying with the idea of making seperate lists for those, but no promises.

Disclaimer: some of these sites are not for young viewers, as they contain adult humor. Practice discretion. As well you should.

Now, on to the list......


THE ZEN PRETZEL TRICK IS PROUD TO GIVE YOU.....

THE 100 BEST WEBSITES OF 2004!


Anecdotage.com
An engrossing site will short, succinct anecdotes...from Patrick Stewart's Beavis & Butt-head collection to Sarah MacLachlan's days as a chubby teen.

Annabelle
The heartwarming tale of an elderly Appalachian woman. Have tissues ready...you'll need them.

The Apostrophe Protection Society
Truly an endangered species....

Arthurnet.com Links
If you love Arthuriana, this is the perfect website for reference links.

The Automatic Flatterer
When you need a little pick-me-up.

Awful Plastic Surgery
Because surely Michael Jackson isn't the only one!

Badads.com: Slam Bad Ads!
Get tired of advertisers hounding you wherever you go? These guys sure do.

Bad Cookie: Real Chinese Web Fortune Cookie
Not your typical fortune....mine today read: "Pray for what you want, but steal what you need." Hmmm....

BadTattoos.com
I love tattoos. GOOD tattoos. This is a site for the bad ones. Hilarious and sad, all at the same time.

Bad Wedding Announcements
I think my favorite is the "Peters/Rising" wedding. I wonder what they served at the reception.

Bible Gateway
Need a verse? Come here first!

Biographical Dictionary
Great for you and the kids...little peeks into the lives of the famous and those who made history.

Bizarrerecords.com
This is just a hilarious site. It features album covers (vinyl, of course) with either bizarre artwork, photos, names or bands. I don't know where they find these things...but I'm glad they do! My favorite is "Music to Drill Oil Wells By."

The Breast Cancer Site: Fund Mammograms For Free!
One free click, and you can save a life. How many sites can claim that?

Bush's Iraq Policy Explained
I LOVE this.

The Candy Wrapper Museum
Love that Mary Jane bar!

Cannot Find Weapons of Mass Destruction
That last link is the best one....

Cannot Get Laid
The next time your computer crashes...maybe it just needs a little lovin'?

A Collection of Musicals Lyrics and Libretti
If you like musicals, this is a great site. No whistles-and-bells, just the lyrics your jazz hands have been craving.

Crazy Thoughts: Life's Unanswered Questions
Some real head-scratchers here...DOES a sheep shrink when it gets wet???

The Cross
A short little reminder that no matter how bad you think your life is....there are many who have it far worse than you do. Be grateful.

Customers Suck! The Customer is Never Right!
If you've ever waited a table, tended a bar, worked a register or sold retail...this is the site for you. The stories here will have you laughing until you cry.

The Darwin Awards
This is the site that "salutes the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally kill themselves in really stupid ways," including Death by Bungee Jumping and Death by Lava Lamp. Unfortunately, these stories are all true.

Defend Your Castle
Cute game in which you (duh) defend your little castle.

Discover Your True Name
My name is apparently "Fearfully Toppling Anarchist."

Disturbing Auctions
Ever see anything on eBay and wonder, "Who would buy such an ugly, weird thing?" Well, you ain't seen nothin' yet. Take a gander at the "Postcard of a goat nursing a baby." It is the single most disturbing thing I've seen since my former stepmonster, Whale Belly, bent over in front of me while wearing blue spandex mini-shorts. Ewww.

Don Markstein's Toonopedia
The Holy Grail for cartoon/comic lovers.

Drunk Confessions
Remember this site the next time YOU get slammed...if you can, lol.

Duct Tape Headline News
Informative and jocular...I naturally adore it.

The 80's Server: Who Can It Be Now?
This is a daily game with album covers from the 80's; you guess the bands. Addictive!

Email Attacker!
For anyone who has ever gotten a nasty email...and lived to laugh about it.

End of the World: An Interesting View on How the World Will End
This animation takes a while to load...but it worth it, I promise.

Enron, WorldCom...Step Aside!
Wonderfully droll animation about the government department screwing Native Americans and non-Native Americans alike.

Etiquette Hell
All of us have dealt with rude relatives, friends and strangers...but this site will take through story after story of pure Manners Massacre. Hilarious and frightening, all at the same time. Warning: it might make you appreciate your in-laws more...maybe.

The Field Guide to North American Boys
I sent this to a single friend of mine, who just loved it.

Flywheel's Random Title & Name Generator
I am the "Countess of Telepathic Snow Dolphins, Mother Angel XVI"
Naturally.

Fontennium
A great---if small---collection of history-inspired free fonts for your computer.

Fortune Teller
It will tell your fortune...sort of. Go one. Give it a try. Just don't blame me.

FOUND Magazine
This is, hands-down, the best online magazine. It features things people have found: notes, photographs, that sort of thing. And it proves that people are, indeed, strange.

The F Word and Its Many Uses
Try not to laugh...it can't be done.

Guardian Unlimited: Do You Know Your Bushisms Quiz?
My results:
You scored 6 out of a possible 10
Some right, some wrong: you are middle-of-the-road man incarnate and a natural George W Bush fan. As he says, "We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbour just like you like to be liked yourself."

Guess the TV Show or Movie Name
Neat little game in which you think of the name of a show or movie and try to stump the webmaster. I've only succeeded twice: with the movie "Thunderheart" and the live-action version of the tv show "The Tick." If you DO manage to win, you'll get to create a question ensuring that the next person won't. More fun than it sounds.

Ha Ha!
This is a great little practical joke to send to your friends.

The Hairstyle Finder
Tons of hairdos for every kind of hair. I love this site.

Heartless Bitches International
Long live the Heartless Bitches!!!

The HIStory of Michael Jackson's Face
Sad. Truly, truly sad.

The History of Useless Inventions
I particularly like the eye protector for chickens.

Ill Will Press
Featuring your lord and master....Foamy!

In Celebration of a Scar
This is a site about women who have survived breast cancer...and turned the scars of their masectomies into beautiful, permanent tattoo art as a testimony of their bravery.
In Passing...
Reports of conversations overheard in elevators, restrooms, on the subway, etc.

I Used to Believe
Funny, sweet and familiar stories of those things we thought were true in our childhoods.

I Work With Fools
Co-workers a nightmare? Join the club!

The Institute of Official Cheer
There is so much to love about this website...the Orphanage of Cast-Off Mascots, the Bad Publicity list, the Dorcus Collection...but without a doubt, the best is the Gallery of Regrettable Food. You may never eat Jell-O again. Which might not be a bad thing.

The Jett Set
This is the official site for Joan Jett...and is it just me, or is she even hotter now than she was in the 80's????

Joe Cartoon
I've been a long-time fan of Joe Cartoon. If you haven't checked it out before, what are you waiting for????? My favorite: Superfly.

Kiss This Guy: The Archive of Misheard Lyrics
Excuse me, while I kiss this guy...I mean, give props to this site!

Lysol Ad, 1948
Can you imagine douching with LYSOL? YIKES!

Madblast: The Negative Effect of Alcohol
I think it dates me that I know the Karate Kid reference....

Mad Cow
This award-winning animation is udderly hilarious (yep...had to use that pun).

Make Stuff: The 'You Can Make It' Site
This is a great site for crafts and using recyclable material.

Mark's Apology Note Generator
When you are truly sorry...but also, truly lazy.

Masturbate For Peace
Well, you might as well do it for a good cause.

MenwholooklikeKennyRogers.com
And man, are there are lot of them!

Message Board Flamers!
If you love message boards, like I do, you'll recognize a lot of your cohorts here! I admit to being a bit of an Ethnix from time to time myself...

The Museum of Bad Art
I can just hear Leonard Pinth Darnell, "This is truly bad, bad art."

The Murphy's Laws Site
Because if it can happen...it will.

The National Multiple Sclerosis Society
This is an unbelievable and invaluable resource for those with MS and those who love them.

Nitpickers.com
Once I was watching re-runs of That 70's Show and wondering...what happened to Donna's two sisters? And remember when Judy on Family Matters just walked up the stairs one day and was never seen nor spoken of again?
If those sorts of things bug you, Nitpickers is a great place to be.

Nose
Try your hand at plucking nose-hairs. My son loves this.

Oh, the Humanity! The Worst Movies on Earth
The layout of this site could use some work...but the content is pure gold.

100 Ways We Show We Care About Our Kids
What can I say about this? It's beautiful.

Only in America!
Funny street signs.

Philosophy of Life
And how true it is.

Punk Rock Girl Paper Doll
The song "Punk Rock Girl" by the Dead Milkmen has always sort of been my anthem...it was played over the intercom when I graduated early from high school.

Punkvoter.com
When you want some politics with your Misfits!

The Random Excuse Machine
My kids love this one.

Real Estate Blooper
Pay close attention to the windows....

Recipes of the Damned: The Back of the Fridge
Fruit Cocktail & Spam Party Loaf, anyone?

The Rip-Off Report: badbusinessbureau.com
Ever felt ripped off? Here's the place to go.

Satire Wire: Passed Over---Syria, Lybia and China Form Axis of Just as Evil
I printed this out and gave it to about a dozen friends. It still makes me giggle.

The Shakespeare Insult Server
Because when someone's pissed you off, only the Bard will do.

The Smoking Gun
All the dirt that's fit to dish.

Streetmattress.com
This site is very, very strange...and very, very funny.

Subservient Chicken
Ask it to dance like Michael Jackson and it will Moonwalk, lol.

Symbols.com
It calls itself: "an encyclopedia of Western signs and ideograms." I just call it fascinating.

Television Without Pity
If you think I'm hard on shows....huh! I bow to the King.

Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About
Well, at least they have a sense of humor about their dysfunctional relationship!

Through the Year
A beautiful film about the beauties God bestows on us all year long.

Topher's Breakfast Cereal Character Guide
Remember Body Buddies? Mr. T Cereal? Quisp? It's all here.

Unfortunate Cards
My favorite? The "Uncle Jackass" one. Although my husband prefers the "Birthday Whipping" one. Which reminds me: I must buy a bustle before my next birthday....

Uglydress.com: Bridesmaids Gowns From Hell
Behold the horrors of the Bridal Thongs and the Pregnant Prom Gown! Aiyee!

Unexplained America: Unsolved Mysteries
Riveting. Makes me miss Robert Stack.

The Urban Legends Reference Pages
Was Bert from Sesame Street ever pictured on a pro-Saddam poster? You bet! Some urban legends are true; many are not. And some can't be proven either way. This site has them all.

The Virtual Candle
Light a candle, say a prayer....

The Wacky Laws Homepage
Just to prove that your tax dollars are hard at work in America, folks.

Welcome to Holland
A beautiful poem about what it's like to be the parent of a special-needs child. Still brings tears to my eyes, every time.

Who's Alive and Who's Dead
Movie & tv stars, political figures, atheletes...if you don't know if they are six feet under or not, here's the page for you.

Wild Mood Swings: Surf the Web on a Whim
Pick your mood, and this will find a site for you.

World's Largest Roadside Attractions
I'm a big fan of "Hobo Joe" myself.

You Kicked My Dog
An animation about a very funny prank call.


And so there they are, folks....100 ways I wasted my time in 2004. Comments?




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