A Trio of Nutbags!

Just when I think that I have seen all the nutbags 2005 has to offer, I get bombarded by these three dolts. As always, my comments are in red:




Woman Tries Swallowing Phone

to End Spat With Lover

BLUE SPRINGS, Missouri (Dec. 24) -- It was a conversation stopper.

A lovers' dispute over a cell phone took a serious turn early Friday morning

when the woman ended the spat by swallowing the phone whole.

Police said they received a call at 4:52 a.m. from a man who said his girlfriend was having trouble breathing.

When they arrived at the house they found the 24-year-old woman had a cell phone lodged in her throat.

"He wanted the phone and she wouldn't give it to him, so she attempted to swallow it," Detective Sgt. Steve Decker of the Blue Springs Police Department. "She just put the entire phone in her mouth so he couldn't get it."

Police said an ambulance transported the woman to St. Mary's Medical Center

in Blue Springs. A hospital spokeswoman said she could not give details about the woman's health since police have not released her identity.

(Ok, I've been in arguments with my husband before. I've been pretty pissed off. But I

have never been angry enough to try to swallow a

CELL PHONE.

What the hell was

she thinking?)


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Tragic Love Triangle

Ends in Murder


The small voice of 7-year-old Katie Marsh reached through the dark, telling

a 9-1-1 dispatcher her mother was mortally wounded.

It happened at a cottage in Ashtabula County, near the shore of Pymatuning Lake. About 9 pm, 32-year-old John Marsh allegedly broke in and shot his estranged wife, 30-year-old Jennifer and her boyfriend 32-year-old David Beach.

The bloody confrontation happened right in front of Katie and her brother Lucas.

Marsh grabbed his 4-year-old son, as his daughter hid in a closet. After a frantic search, officers found Marsh at his nearby home, with the boy unharmed.

Marsh's father says his son and daughter-in-law split up in July. His wife was frightened enough to get a restraining order, making John give up his weapons. Neighbors say bitter harassment continued between the two.

The kids, including the couple's oldest son Curtis, are staying with Jennifer's relatives. The community is very small and lots of people know some or all the people in this tragic love triangle. What no one ever expected was that hard feelings would end in murder.

In addition to the Marsh's three children, David Beach had three kids of his own. Meanwhile, John Marsh remains behind bars.

(This man should ROT behind those bars. What this article

doesn't tell you is that before the little girl hid, she tried to call 911...and her father took the phone from her. This was prior to

her courageous call that, in all likelyhood, saved her brother's life. But you know what REALLY pisses me off about this story? Click the link and watch the video. This asshole's father is

actually blaming the VICTIM. She "drove him to it," according

to Grandpa of the Year there. Holy cow, I hope these kids never see Dad or Grandpa again...for their own sakes...)

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Man Charged After Toddler Found Drunk


PATCHOGUE, N.Y. Dec 29, 2005 A 37-year-old man was charged with child endangerment after one of two toddlers he was baby-sitting was found drunk, authorities said.

Suffolk County sheriff's deputies investigating a family court case peered through the window of a Patchogue home Tuesday and saw Juan Reyes passed out with the children wandering around the house.

They managed to rouse Reyes, who was the only adult at home with the two toddlers, ages 2 and 3, according to the sheriff's office. The deputies said Reyes appeared extremely intoxicated.

The deputies also noticed the 2-year-old was having difficulty standing, had bloodshot eyes, smelled of alcohol and was lethargic.

The toddler was taken to the hospital, where tests revealed he was legally intoxicated, with a blood-alcohol content of 0.094 percent, the sheriff's office said. In New York, a driver is considered drunk with an alcohol content of 0.08 percent or greater.

The second child was taken into the custody of Child Protective Services.

At the time, the children's parents were at a hospital, where the mother was giving birth.

Robert Clifford, spokesman for the Suffolk County district attorney, said the children's family lives at the house where the toddlers were found. Reyes also gave that as his address during his arraignment.

(Let me see if I have this straight: the parents, 2 kids and a drunk are all living in the same house. Mom goes to the hospital to have baby #3, and leaves the kids with...the drunk, who drinks himself into a stupor and doesn't notice the kid drinking enough alcohol to lay out a linebacker. That kid could easily have died from alcohol poisoning, and who knows what the long-term affects of this will be. And child protective services only removed ONE of the remaining two kids? If these parents are this fucking stupid, this fucking irresponsible...why would anyone think they should be trusted with a newborn?

Eek gads.)

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my 2nd annual Nutbags of the Year Awards will be posted here in January. Don't read on a full stomach.....!